Sunday, December 12, 2010
something happened a day before my birthday. it's like a heavy lesson for life from my 20's. DONT TAKE CRITICISM PERSONALLY. and when you're dealing with a woman, (especially menopausal) always coat your words with honey, and bear in mind, women are prone on taking everything personally and they're more judgemental.
where can i have Ruiz's The Four Agreements and Dasgupta's Solo?
somehow, i felt old. this, being thirty is depressing. maybe, if we let go of those usual expectations, it'll be easier. i dont know. or, should i rather, strive for that usual expectations and be what? normal? as expected?
Tuesday, December 7, 2010
Saturday, December 4, 2010
Tuesday, November 23, 2010
The highlight of the weekend was Noel's Birthday party on saturday's night! too many good things to mention (and i dont have a picture to share). enough to say, from now on, i'm a converted baking enthusiast! O i so love the moist carrot cake (and i never ate anything sweet with cinnamon).Dy, your carrot cake was the only exception.
and the plan for 10 days DownUnder?! guys, i AM in.
kaibigan, kasi up stamina okey? mesti berjalan dengan sangat bersemangat merayau-rayau di Wat itu..
when words failed to describe the outburst of feeling you felt when that boy ran to his grandpa and said "you bought everything for me?". and you knew part of his history. and looking at apu's, nenek's and mommy's faces (the struggles they may have been through). and realized, this is love. this is the feel of being loved.
Friday, November 19, 2010
and please, try not to be too overzealous on converting them to your religion (ie: books, sewing, crochet) not everybody love the concept of a quite evening WITHOUT a TV. get real, its not zaman batu.
most of all, let them play with your friend's cats and feed them well. (the human and cats)
you can let them sit on your living room floor if you dont own and sofa. its ok to let them sleep on the floor also. and let them use their backpacks as a pillow. provide enough air abok for this purpose. it'll do the trick. (the JUNK proved to provide stiff cocktails- bring them there). you? keep on sipping shiraz.
Hinakah aku kerana tidak memiliki set TV di zaman moden ini ?
Sunday, November 7, 2010
The caption on his shirt really funny, come to think of it. but the wearer's good looking face somehow make the caption seems serious. or does it make it more hillarious? super-indon. muahahaha!
I read The Girl with the Dragon Tattoo and funnily, the author kept on telling the readers the caption on the heroine's T-Shirt (i lost count- my favourite was: Armageddon was yesterday. today we have a serious problem). its not funny story. its intensely savage.
Somehow, over the weekend, i managed to read (in order) House Rules-Jodi Picoult, the Girl with the Dragon Tattoo, The Girl who played with Fire - Stieg Larsson, Spot of Bother- Mark Haddon and To Kill a Mockingbird - Harper Lee. and 25 first pages of Moby Dick.(aww.. the last book will take me a month if not more to finish) and i will re-read all those books, starting with To Kill a Mockingbird.
how do i rate them books?
1. To kill a mockingbird - i dont know why i never want to pick this book before. this is one fine book. honest, simple, wholesome. (i see my dad in Atticus, and mighty lucky to have En. Mujat as a father-Pong, you should read this book)
2. Spot of Bother- i think highly of Haddon first book -The Incident of the Dog in the Night Time. this second novel not quite up to the first's level. but its good. very good actually. hillarious, insanely humane, touching. (my family seems ordinary compared to the Hall's family). i cant wait for another Haddon's in the future.
3. Stieg Larsson's books. i'd seen the movie. "Män som hatar kvinnor". and i was blown over. i even like that unknown actor who played Kalle Blomkvist (upss... sorry.. ya, sure all these times we only knew them Hollywood). i usually will love the book version better than the movie. but, in this case, i have to say, i LOVE the movie more!. the setting was perfect, the actress was superb. even the rape scene looks real! and that- super savage. do, go to youtube and find the trailer. so, now i have to have the last of the triology, The Girl Who Kicked the Hornet's Nest. btw, i like the 2nd novel better. more feeling, more resentment. (have you ever wonder, whats all those books lined up on IKEA's displayed racks- now, i have a glimpse of their literature, i'm awfully sorry i cant read those) (pong, you should read this to show GATAN that he is famous in Sweden.. all those places ended with .....gatan)
4. House Rules- normally, i'd cry over Jodi's. not this one. i am still a big fan of hers. and no plan on dropping her from my must read list. but after more than 10 books, you began to see the pattern and its not as exciting nor eye opener anymore. one of the main reason we read is to open our eyes to new possibilities, ideas and perspectives. if the technique became stale, its like eating stale bread. satisfying, but not deliciously satisfying.
book for december's cart. ya, i made a budget list for books to buy. i need to save money for our March Holiday!- 1. Larsson's final triology of The Girl. 2. Solo by Rana Dasgupta.
Lucky is the best word for having a family you trully love. one, that, if you have a choice, you'd picked them anyway. Lucky is the best word for finding in the million heaps of people in the world, few rare good friends. and we treasure them, because we knew, we cant be in a winning streak forever.
p/s kaibigans! its november! peringatan pertama.. muahahahaha!
Wednesday, November 3, 2010
Tuesday, October 26, 2010
Did i said he's artistic?. o.. he did a bit of music. he was strumming on his dad's guitar one day and i asked him what song was he trying to play (i was tone deaf, to his music taste, i guess). with 'what-a-super-dorky-question-is-that'? expression on his face. he sternly replied 'anak monyet la. itu pun kau tidak tau?'.....'oooo' was all i managed to say. truth to be said, none of the keys made sense. btw, he's 4 years old. now (3 years later), i think, he's good with his guitar already.
sometimes, i wonder if i speak to my kids with Azril's enthusiasm to his music but nonsensical to other's ears. and believe me, i can be more than a little enthusiastic talking about things i like (like chemistry- ya, come roll on your eyes).
many times, i wonder, if in my lectures, the lessons intent transpired to the students or not. Today, for example, after a whole semester of teaching the fourth semester students Health System Research, after hours of drilling them to write the final report in correct format. a pack of stubborn faces come with a compilation of poorly prepared reports. i'm compelled to scream, but that would be so unprofessional. through clenched teeth i showed them which part needs re-surgery. (i mean, re-writing)
you only need to poke me with your finger to make me burst. today.
i still have a soft spot for good looking, artistic and moody students. Azril was in my sunday school class. ya, i'm a sunday school teacher also. the one, who stuffed them with Bible stories and questions hard enough for their moms to answer.
good advice for a teacher (or anyone in the teaching profession): think patient. and try be.
Sunday, October 24, 2010
Do your best, leave the rest to heaven. thats how we find peace on earth. knowing our limitation and opening up for divine intervention. really, its up to Him to decide.
Thursday, October 21, 2010
and like a blushing teenage i cried (for full 5 minutes?). i blamed the influenza virus and me being so sick that i felt sorry for myself. but, really, i need that good cry to ease myself (like i always did) and it felt good.
i badly want to win the choir competition. and i cant see why we didnt! we performed good, slightly off tempo, but overall, good. so, no. i cant accept that we failed. i knew, my kids were devastated. what with all those hours of practice! and expectation.
my reply to that boy : ahaha! Astaga! napa ko ckp mcm org tua2 ni max? sy sgt proud sm kamurang. i dont really cr kita dpt p melaka ka x. as a teacher, great accmplshmt sdh 2 if my kids lrnt smthg other than wat the book can taught! no need 2 say sorry. we did great!
Putting on different perspective helps. but, it doesnt change the fact that we failed. does it really matter? when you knew, that winning is not everything and maybe it requires re-definition?
Sunday, October 17, 2010
A reminder for 'why i love this tee so much' - mostly because it's green, it's freshly laundered and smell super nice, because i miss all those who were there when we purchased the tee, and the word 'mum', makes me think of my mom. and i love the tag. and because, it reminded me of a very good looking sanguine boy (who sang a Creed's song) who, won a karaoke competition and a nerdy boy who did his best sereneding Saleem's jauh kau pergi meninggalkan diriku...(btw, i was the lucky bitch to judge the competition, and i swear, i judged purely on the voice qualities. incidently, that Creed boy sang beautifully and the nerd sang off tempo). All unfairness asides, life itself, is full of unfairness. just so, i'm reminding myself.
its not just a tag of a favourite tee, its a reminder of good things in life. and i am counting my blessings.
Tuesday, October 12, 2010
it was all started when i came to the minimum specification of bukaan pengudaraan and mentioned that my father's house failed to comply with that specification. our living room in my father's house in Ranau is like a cave. it's surrounded by bedrooms, that the only bukaan are the front entrance and the kitchen entrance. i compared that to my grandpa's house (our old house), which had bukaan tetap along the ridge of the ceiling and wall. i remember the old house being cool and airy even on a hottest day. i remember the smell of the old woods of that old house. To this day, the smell of woods trigger my mind to remember that old house.
so, off handedly i asked the students (128 of them) to write down their best childhood memory and smell that remind them of childhood. all, but 3 gave me heart-warming, funny, silly and down -right owh!- you-too? kind of revealation.
the best response i got :
1. Apakah kenangan paling bagus semasa kita masih kanak-kanak: mencuri buah-buahan kampung sebelah, curi ayam dan memaki hamun om pekerja ketua kampung
2. apa bau yang sampai sekarang kita terkenangkan zaman kanak-kanak: bau ubi kayu bakar, kerana selalu membakar ubi kayu semasa kanak-kanak (kadang-kadang curi orang punya ubi)
Selecting memories and keeping only the good will do me more good than keep on holding to all and trying to right something i simply cant undo.
Sunday, October 10, 2010
the wildflowers (of plants on my windowsill) remind me of childhood. of times (seems like yesterday.. mmmm..), me gathered the same wildflowers and bunga rumput malaysia, and put those in a vase of pot sardin king cup. i remember being happy and satiated. watching it wilted and rush to gather some more. sunday morning was my favourite, because i got morning off daily chores and put flowers on my favourite pet's grave. (the whole of our backyard is a graveyard). that considering, a shortlived tadpoles got a proper burials. no wonder mom's vegetables flourish with no aid of chemical fertilizer.
i am reading To The Hilt by Dick Francis. if i really can do whatever i want, wherever. will i do what i'm doing now, here?. or should i rather do something else, somewhere? what is it that i really want in life? is this the kind of life i want to live?
maybe a simple life on a mountainside will do. and i'll put that on hold for a few more years to let fate shows me the way around. so God, steer.
Tuesday, October 5, 2010
Sunday, October 3, 2010
this is a positive sign of loneliness and dire need to stop by any bookstore. I'm trying to listen to Hansard, with dry eyes. failed miserably. anybody knew where can i get the movie DVD?
Monday, September 27, 2010
i have trouble sleeping. so, i read and re-read. i'm writing a review of Irving's Twisted River. i'll post it sometime this week. i read twice, Farish's Quran and cricket. read Luke, and felt like i never read it before. i tried hard not to watch movies (as i tend to go marathon).
i woke early today, only to realize, its almost 7 am. heavy rain in Kuching. real melancholic feel. a good day to start my week.
i find this picture, and i cant help but to smile.
Wednesday, September 22, 2010
This is the sister I’d like to introduce him. Lyrice (pronounce: Lai – ris (latin))@ Kiris. matila dia maradang sama saya, if she knew what i almost did.
Me and our youngest sister, Lisa
p/s: jen, please check Land before time I and II (good for our superstar pujaan). Our second song for the choir is the soundtrack for Land before Time I “if we hold on together”. MAX! thanks for the amazing song selection and thanks for sharing what moved you to pick the song. (mari kasi kalah tu pondan-pondan <--- astaga! prejudisnya!)
Friday, September 17, 2010
Monday, September 13, 2010
i still have Farish Noor and Irving for weekend and a new mug to accompany me. my hexies progress in my my other blog "my passion" and i paste picture of the front cover of books i read over there.
i'm going to write a review of Kisil's book. so i wont rant about it here. i found the author's blog Tea with Tina. she's a new blogger and if you think her book good, her blog is a must visit.
Sunday, September 12, 2010
still a bit disoriented. telampau tidur, telampau makan and telampau tiak buat apa-apa during the looooooong holidays.
Malaysia airlines inflight magazine sept issue quite interesting (i'll blog about this later). i need to have TAPAI and Tina Kisil's - footprints in the paddy fields. i mentioned the book to my sis on the day i arrived in KK and she got hers already (she bought it for Rm32.90 at Eaton's).
i tried crocheting and my bro comment: bah satu tahun laitu kau kasi siap tu selimut. it might as well. the hexies still on the stagnant phase, collecting dust. (i am too ambitious on saying finish by 'mid sept'? its mid sept already)
the kids are on their mid sem break, so, i'm phasing myself from holiday mood to office somber environment. to all you guys still in holiday.. enjoy.
Wednesday, August 25, 2010
i'll blog about GFG Edensor in my other blog : My Passion. for the appropriateness of header. (actually, i want to get rid of that other blog, but since i have this new-found passion). why not make use of it? and Jakarta-Bandung blog is barely breathing. ya, i know i am a shame.
i have to tell about MAX. our choir leader. (btw, Jen asked "sejak bila ko jadi Simon?") o i wish! i was appointed to oversee the college's choir team (no, i actually volunteered- bah, compare being in a choir to berbalas pantun empat kerat.. hows that?). o God, i never could ask for a better choir leader. patient, fun and commited. now, i think we really have a chance to win the competition. and suddenly, i realize, i might be a Simon after all.... heheh.. (ko mesti tinguk derang pny audition..sy yg tuli note pun sampai sakit perut. nyanyi sendiri pun pandai sumbang). (i'll post picture of him and the team later)
i urgently need a new mug. i broke the old one this morning. can you imagine i named my mug "kapiting"?. no apparent reason. (its a free mug from KKM-sihat sepanjang hayat). i used a cup to drink my tea this morning, and somehow, its not right. i urgently need a new mug. (cups are for sharing. mug is for solitary drink). does it make sense to you? (overdose Edensor baini.. still struggling with the hangover)
p/s selamat berposting. ya, i remember.
Thursday, August 19, 2010
i reread most of my books (for the lack of new materials). but, there are certain books that you come and read it back and find new meaning, new revelation. and other book, you, willingly come back and re-read and re-read, because the sentences are too beautiful to be read once. and you read word by word (bookworms knew the trick of scan reading-skimming through). but some books, grab your attention and slow down your pace until the words actually have a taste in your tongue (when you try to read it out loud- no, fast reading wont afford this). for me, Andrea's Sang Pemimpi is one of the tasty one. Wroblewski's The Edgar Sawtelle Story, Caputi's Loving Evie and all of Irving's.. their words have taste i cant place. lingering taste like good wine.
so, this girl tempted us with her Double Roti. ayayayay.. tasty. wicked pictures! woi.. orang puase lar!
talking about tasty stuff. i was blown away by Nestle La Creamerie vanilla ice cream with cashew nuts and chocolate sauce. 500 ml? gobbled in less than 30 mins. neat.
and, can i make a rule not to allow students to wear a waffle scent after shave during Ramadhan to class ? they are hot enough minus the after shave and super delicious with the scent. oooo.. goody. wicked!
mare, if he did top up the downloaded movie with satu bungkus mee kolok and laksa sarawak.. nahhhh.. double kissssssesss and hugsss.
Dawn, i love the idea of being in love with the idea of love. it kinda put thing in perspective.
Friday, August 13, 2010
my kaibigans are planning for our Indo-China escapade next year. (blame it on AirAsia's RM1 promotion) thanks Tony!. so my plan? find good books about those places. on Pol Pot (communist movement in Cambodia), really should find one. Thanks cik adek, for planning out the trip.
stealing time to finish Cornwell's the Scarpetta factor. i'm planning to drop her from my must read list. shes getting boring and o so predictable. i wish, Benton stayed dead, i miss the old self Marino. (maybe this is the effect of reading a series
i cant wait for 27th. i'm flying home. the plan? just in time to catch the last of rambutans off the tree. hopefully still have la. celebrating National Day with the family and do some serious food tasting. bah.. the muffins with tarap sauce on, ya? i'll exchange with some bosou do gipan.. oooo sweet plan.
Thursday, August 5, 2010
i will definitely get that TAPAI. and it is not especially because he refers to food akin to sex. i am so bloated. i need to kentut, or else. (in my utak: org dusun main rabus saja, main hantam-hantam kasi masuk dalam balanga saja- how will that stands in Rais's comparison to the technique?)
this week hot story: Popong successfully baked her first batch of muffins. thus, the spell of kek inda kambang finally, officially over. and i wrongfully, gave her, buttermilk compositions. sorry, aku mengantuk baitu, butterscotch bah pulak. ya. yoghurt, works fine. bah. congrats.
cik adeks: nampaknya penyakit kelupaan kita makin jangkit berjangkit. psssttt.. mau bincang bisnes bagus punya. now, i really need to kentut.
i'm beyond the age of farting jokes being funny (sepatutnyala). i teach chemistry, so, ya, i knew for fact that it's just nitrogen, carbon dioxide, oxygen, methane, and hydrogen sulfide gases from our stomach to anus. but, i do think kentut as funny. funny haha.. not funny peculiar. merah muka si kawan tahan kentut. seriously funny.
Monday, July 26, 2010
so, jen's laptop went kong too. and she suggested us to re-visit HCMC. all pictures taken there went missing. hard disk problem. i have to laugh a bit here and tease jen. nah.. kan, mana ko punya saranan sendiri buat copy?. my beloved pinky Dell went kong a week earlier.
so, all my notes and slide presentations went missing with the hard disk. been a really busy week for me, preparing (again) those notes. hence the hiatus in my blog post. and i wont post any pictures for a while (not in august). i'll elaborate later.
i'm on my new patchwork project (nearly completed 2). Mimi seems to get infected. she started her log cabin patch. me with my hexagons. about 480 hexies to go! and my patchwork project's fancy title "pink pant her". i'll post picture of completed material. according to my calculation, that'll be sometime in september.
i'll go missing from the virtual world next week. its another field work. which i am actually looking forward for. i miss being in the woods, walk in the rain, play with muds and not to think too much. lately, thinking too much lead me to miss somebody, i shouldnt. O crap! exactly my point!
Sunday, July 18, 2010
my handphone 'melarikan diri' and i've changed my number. i'll somehow retrieve the old number. (i lost the darling 'icecream' LG Hp). sedih ni.
bought a new pair of NB running shoes. (yay! dengan harapan, akan rajin berjogging. hahahhaha!) lawak eh!
p/s depression mode. after satu minggu menghabiskan duit kerajaan and bermakan sakan with that sister yg menyelamatkan aku dari tiak berhp. (thanks jen!). aku shock dengan kerja yg banyak menimbun.
Thursday, July 8, 2010
Sunday, June 27, 2010
malam kebudayaan (26/06), i planned to wear the dress (tailored in HCMC~ mikirayou, because its bloody cheap) but, finally changed the plan. i settled for orang Ulu's traditional costume. (Di!, thanks for being my magician, less than 24 hours to get me one of those gorgeous costume! i cant thank you enough)
and i'm glad i bought this. A story, in a story, in a story, of a story. (Dickens' story, in Watt's, in Matilda's by Jones). i only can think of 'Blood Diamond' (the film) to match the horror and deep, deep fear it potrayed.
Monday, June 14, 2010
Sunday, June 6, 2010
chance upon Farish A. Noor's "what your techer didn't tell you-the annexe lectures vol.1". interesting, provocative and stimulating. i dont entirely agree with some of his opinion, but, its his book. his says. (after all, his articles are havily padded with back up literature-- evidence enough to tell, he knew what he's talking)
Tuesday, June 1, 2010
Tuesday, May 25, 2010
Monday, May 17, 2010
Sunday, May 9, 2010
Sunday, April 25, 2010
Sunday, April 18, 2010
Wednesday, April 7, 2010
Monday, April 5, 2010
Wednesday, March 17, 2010
I'm reading "turning thirty" for clear reason. It scares the hell of me! (not the book, the number)
I know, this too will pass, but how bergaya?
Most importantly (than what?), this weekend, i think i'll have my first date with a real Indonesian man on their soil. ahhh.. ngapain ni deg-degan jantung gwe?. oo. its not the jantung, its my perut. aduh ni.. srabi, soto, soda gembira, sotong bakar, (ahhh.. delman?)
Monday, March 8, 2010
Sunday, February 28, 2010
Do listen to Rivermaya. My favourite is: 241 (my Favourite song). A good reminder to a stubborn heart. i bought their "You'll be safe here". my students asked, why bother buying when Youtube provides
for free? indeed why?. anyhow, do listen to Rivermaya.
A certain girl in Batu Caves and a man in Bristol urged me to go and play with dirt. Planting greens. And I got myself Envirosax bag. Though I have to say, this will be my first and last purchase. (its polyester, which is man made textile—not so environmental friendly I guess) I’d sew my own jut/ cotton bag for grocery shopping.(as if!)
a good friend safely delivered her baby girl (Syhaweh Shana)last thursday and my favourite PT (cik pah- now, i have to call her MUM), where i work delivered her first baby! (a boy!) also on thursday. (God! now i have the urge to go hunting for good sperm!) any taker?
congratulation Woly and Alfredo and Dondoyo.