Beautiful numbers you think? ya, its my birthday. ;)
I usually took a leave on my birthday to celebrate it (running away from the comfort of home and spent a few days outside). But, since last year, i didnt do that, and it felt quite right, i come to work today. i still fast on my birthday (or at least, abstaining from food for at least 12 hours), and that feel right too. dont ask me why i do this and that, its just a random things, no particular meanings. i feel good doing it.
so, how was it? surviving to hit 33?
There's a lot of things i have yet to do. challenges that i should soldier on. mistakes that i should redeem. few regrets, that i don't really mind having. life has been really good. many more ups than the downs.
I only have one wish for my birthday: For God to put me in the right place, and for me to faithfully serve Him, with all my being, heart, mind and soul. (yeah, i know i shouldn't tell people the wish. but, that's a too general wish, so, that doesn't count, i think). and yeah, i know it sounds poyo. i am poyo, just so you know.
Recently, i read a book by Jon Katz; Dog Days. i love the way he writes, he transported me to his Bedlam Farm, looking at his dogs, sheep, donkeys, farm hands, guests. maybe because i was raised in an agricultural community where talking to animals and trees are considered normal, i understand the level of intimacy he has with his farm. Some people are just not as articulate as Katz in sharing the relationship to others.
Intimacy is a bond. it always started with eagerness to know (passion), love and trust.
i tried very hard to bond with a cute 2 year old with more success at each tries. she's eager to know me i knew, but she doesn't trust me yet. How can she trusts me? i cant even decipher her talk (which was, at the moment half-english, half-God). every time we started a conversation, she gets frustrated, i get frustrated, i always turned to her aunt Jane for clarification. and because Jane spent more time with the 2 yo, she got the privilege of intimacy with her.
This, makes me realize, the only way i can learn to listen to God is to spend more time with Him, building intimacy.
for that matter, the only way to know others is to spend time with them.