early symptom of getting old

forgetful me! i forgot his birthday! darn! (well, at least i was somewhere with no telco signal during the weekend) (matilah ni!)  

macamana mau kasetau ni?

come, april

april's coming. half semester through. half works done. and i'm changing my mind. i am about to rearrange my wish list. on top of my new list: Blondal sewing machine. it's just superneat!

(iyalah tu, lepas bili, kasi betagar macam ko punya gitar)

april's coming. 1/4 of the year passed by. maybe i should do more than just rearranging back my wish list. maybe i should do more on changing my mind. maybe i should really stop collecting things i dont really need in life. stop hoarding, emotionally. to be more carefree and start eating meat again? 

(see, what happened to my otak udang after a hilarious encounter with a thunderbolt hero- yeah, the Zeus himself)

he too, gone!

one of the best thing coming home for me was being welcomed by a man's sincere, sweet smile (he's on the advert board for Sarawak tourism, strategically located facing the escalator going down from immigration check point). somehow, he made me at ease and convinced that i was at the right place. and he's gone. i came from KL last night, expecting very eagerly to see him. and he's not there!. instead, the 'borneorainforestmusicfestivalpalau' is there. no, i'm not against the feast. it's a good thing (sorry, but theres a lot of buts here..). 

ahhhh... maybe i'm a bit emotional over my considerable loss, maybe i feel the music feast has been degraded to a meaningless party. duh!

more than just meet the eyes

i always love gardening. my first crop was garlic. planted neatly on my mom's long beans patch. i dont remember exactly what happened in the end to that garlic. but, i remember being happy watching them grow. and excitedly wait for morning to come, so i could measured the blades. maybe, thats the real reason for my fondness for garlic. those early memories of happiness. i love it pungent smell. it reminds me of childhood. 

i knew at least a person who hate garlic. he despised garlic in his food. i love that guy. he's a very good friend of mine. and he's gone. i was having this crab crackers with garlic, when the sudden thought of him hit me. then.. i wonder, why certain smell sharpen our memories of something. now, i knew, what Dyer meant by "and over all of this is the deep blue of empty sky-the colour of memory". it's not the blue, blue. it's the memory of that deep blue of empty sky! (and things happened under it). or so. 

should hunt for more of his book. its good.

Eternal rest

how can we shooooh grief?

he's dead

all of us eventually will

so, whats a big deal with it?

still... the ache linger, and grief persist (if only i knew, for how long)

farewell friend, have your rest.

p/s : to Nimrod J Ojilim, you never failed to surprise me. 

away..

away for a while

will be back when i will

sakitmacammaumati!

i just want to be where you are

i was searching for a good clip, that at least can convey what i feel for a very good friend (who, according to her own word "gilermatirindukorang") (itu kah tu jen?)

instead, i found this. and i thought, its perfect. in its own way. and.... i love this version.

i miss you too jen. more,  i miss those time, when we wanted nothing but to be together for Him.

i believe, that longing, never really go away, it's in us. how can we undo love?

(ahhh... in case, u in Kuching tis 27-29/03, u are officially invited to a retreat di kampung sy, di Pedaun, Bau) (Dy, if u want to introduce ur handsome bf to the madness of 'tarzan' mandi sungai, both of u are cordially invited)... yeah... ada sungai belakang rumah. your uncle Harry, organize a joint retreat for 3 medical colleges. let's pray for things like we had in PD..

i refuse to let go

i was posting  a comment in a fellow blogger's blog, when this word verification JUNIN appeared and it registered to my mind as a ninja's rank! (apply only for Naruto's fans). then i realized, word verification supposed not to mean anything. then.. i  google up JUNIN (highland in Peru!) (ada bah pula!), Junin Virus causing AHF.. but no ninja's rank. 

how old am i? 

well, i hope my students appreciate the fact that i'm the only tutor who knew Sakuragi Hanamichi, Ansai Sensei, kokure, Gori... and yeah, for not slapping student who slept during class due lack of chakra!

i have yet to find who answered "gambir" for this question "apakah yang menyebabkan ikatan logam sangat kuat berbanding dengan ikatan kimia yang lain?".  and.. no, i didn't mentioned anything about steel rod.

updates

a very good friend invited me for JASON MRAZ concert in KL tis march, 4th. thanks for the invitation pare, (mau nangis tidak dapat pigi ni!), but i have to pass. we have this seminar, where dissapearing act wont work..pare, please dont give up on me.. do invite me in the future.. u know i love concert!! (hahhahahahha! takut tia kena invite lagi ni...)

more good things....next week... travelling week (yay!) i am always excited to go travel with my batch (DKP10). they will do  practical for health education. 4 groups, (HFMD, Dengue, Malaria and food poisoning). i've seen them in field, and they're good. 

as for this week. the students having their mid term break. and i'm having my 'breather' week. i knew, by wednesday, i'll be missing them already.. but, as of now, i really can settle so many things without the interruption of classes. 

p/s: whil phil, thanks for the invitation. enjoy ur holidays.