Happy Birthday Jane!

Happy Birthday, Jane. the leading role in the pics. You have been amazing to all of us. and you deserve all happiness in the world. God bless.

golombon*

Jen, Dawn, Me, Juvi, Popong, Fread

[i like this picture, because somehow, i got a dimple (and i love dimple, instantly freshen up a look) which is not actually a dimple. it's a laughline (positive) or a deepen premature wrinkle (very..very negative)] on our recent visit Downunder. for more pictures of us, go to her

i tried not to compare the place with ours, because it'd be really unfair. it's an expensive place to live in, eating out everyday is out of question. even at the sloppiest fast food joint. but, how can one not fall in love with a place where even a construction workers spend sometime off their lunch time reading?, and where books are waaaaaay cheaper than a cuppa? their waiting area at airports are almost like a library, people read while waiting for their flights. its a culture, we must aspire to adopt.

Personally, i'm still short of 20 books to read to reach my annual bookreads of 54. reading will not make us any smarter then those who doesnt, or make us any better than the non-reader. but, reading certainly broaden up perspective and with that, better understanding of others and oneself. and i guess, that's how we armed our self to face the world.

my students are still away for their mid-term holiday. the office is quieter than usual, many of my muslim colleagues are still on holidays. truthfully, i miss my kids and colleagues. the holiday was great. Australia is a lovely country. i'll go again next year maybe (Perth). but, right now, nothing will settle me better than normal classes to attend and the mundane tasks of tending to my kids.

advice for Malaysian visiting Australia, please dont bother applying for a room at Malaysian Hall Melbourne (they still exist? they didnt reply to our numerous e-mails and phone calls and faxes). and i also dont recommend staying at Malaysian Hall Sydney (something should be done there, the place looks really rundown). but, at least MH Sydney replied to our enq promptly. and the students squatting there are mostly polite. with one exception for the golombon* kid. haiya... teda orang ambil gambar kah si golombon?

*fat/overweight

p/s: astaga.. makin golombon plak sy lepas cuti-cuti ni

Hot blondie; you belong to me

Jason Wade of Lifehouse

i dont write lyrics. But, if i could, this is what i'd like to write and serenade to Mimi's Little boy (on behalf of his mommy). click here to download the song. its one of the soundtracks in the movie Shrek

You Belong To Me
Jason Wade of Lifehouse

see the pyramids along the Nile
watch the sun rise
from the tropic isle
just remember darling
all the while
you belong to me

see the market place
in old Algiers
send me photographs and souvenirs
just remember
when a dream appears
you belong to me

and i'll be so alone without you
maybe you'll be lonesome too

fly the ocean
in a silver plane
see the jungle
when its wet with rain
just remember till
you're home again
you belong to me

This one is for him,

if i can choose my 5 persons to meet in heaven, i want him to be my first. i want to tell him that, he's the loveliest, bravest person, ever. because, i didnt have the chance to tell him that, in person, in this world.

pok sahari called me thursday evening informing that Mimi has been transfered to Hospital Sg. Buloh. she's getting worse. private hospitals did that to avoid bad stats. i wanted to call, but dont know what to say. about 11 am the next day, she texted me:'Blom ada rezeki utk kami lg..1030 pg td baby kluar, sy brsalin mcm biasa.. baby boy..sy redha'

i didnt know, if i was paining for her or the boy who didnt make it. i just wanted to cry. its Good Friday and i have plenty of reasons to cry. i was crying for Mimi, and fates cruel play upon her. my heart crushed for the boy.

saturday afternoon, went to see her, as always, she amazed me.she looked okay. better than i expected. then, i saw her hubby's eyes. that's the saddest eyes i've ever seen. its apparent, he's paining for his wife. silently weeping for his boy. he, sadden me the most.

this year's Easter, was the first 'real' Easter for me. the hope of resurrection and salvation. because, without such hope, what's my chance to see that little boy who was loved long before he was conceived.

i wept reading Parson's The Family Way. but, nothing could ever prepare me, going through one.

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
a friend who jokingly offered his shoulder to cry on found himself in sticky situation when i replied, i could use his offer, as i need a good cry.

out of our hand

i watched a movie last night on TV (remember, i dont own a TV?). well, i'm in Port Dickson for work related matter. obviously, the hotel have TV. "Lucky 7" on 8TV. its about a girl's obsession over her dead mom final advice of getting married only to the lucky 7th bf. she fall for the number 6th guy. many things in life are just out of our hand.

tonight, i planned to crash at a good friend's house. weekend, i have a seminar to attend in Sg. Buloh. earlier this morning she smsed me, her grandma passed away and she's going back to her hometown. she even said sorry for messing up my plan. Oh God!my problem is the least in the equation, aint it? she lost her grandma. the GRANDMA. my condolence jen.

my gf, mimi, all these years longs for a baby. she finally get pregnant, and in her 4th month of pregnancy. many complications, i even asked God, what dugaan He bestow to that fine lady? she wanted a baby so much, she's willing to go through anything. she's in the hospital ward, the bleeding get worse. i knew, thing like that is just out of our hand to control.

i read a great book, years ago (sorry i cant recall the title, i got the book from our local libray). the wise man in that book, an old chinese said "do your best and leave the rest to heaven". many things are out of our hand. for those things, we cant do much, but just to leave its to heaven to decide. but for all other things, which effort on our part, plays, no matter how insignificant in the result. its a sin not to go, all out.


"showdown" makes me really think to consider having the Astro dish! the show is wicked to boot! not to say it's also wickedly inspiring to go all out for your passion. maybe one chance is all we got. we better move it right. ait?

friday's breakfast special

i should be eating Pho for breakfast in Saigon today. i decided to stay and do my job instead. i have to catch on my classes and finish the syllabus before their mid term, by the end of this month. its a fine friday morning here in Kuching. a bit cloudy, just the way i like it best. But, wouldnt it be grand if i were sitting in a stall in saigon slurping away my second helping of pho bo?

notes: i blame the system in Bahagian pengurusan Latihan for my failure to comply to my schedule. they always sent letter for meetings a few days before the events, like they never plan anything. just because we're under the ministry of health, doesnt mean everything should be done 'emergency' way.

i read in the Star (Sarawak version) about Mahathir's memoirs. let it stew (say, a year?, or maybe when he's gone?). i'll read it someday, but, i'm not dying to know what he has to say about himself. or any justification for whatever done, whatsoever. I am a Sabahan, and i'm not over yet of what he've done to us.

Thinking of Saigon (and longing to be there) makes me think of that book. Saigon: being re-named Ho Chi Minh City, when it's the last and least to abide to communism. i'm mulling over the idea on correlation of important figures, ego and ego-feeds (just finished reading Heartsblood by Paul Martin- a book so medically entertaining (relatively to the books i skimmed through, writing the proposal) and concerning the ego things). Mahathir's book and HCMC are ego-feeds.

p/s: feeding myself tomato for dinner. the first tomato from my window's balcony garden.

Youtube rules!

Caution! please dont click on the links provided if you are in a melancholic mood. These links are super-inducer to melancholism.

Jason Mraz: You and I Both

Mercy Me: Homesick

and Eva Cassidy, O! she's amazing! Song bird, Fields of Gold

and this. (i dont have TV, so i dont really follow Glee. but, i do know about their existence).

and to provide some balance in this somehow sappy post. go to this blog.

and this: keep on appearing in my mind

kaibigan @ kambingan

sometimes ago,

Popong, me and Dawn were seated at the back of a car. Jane was driving and Fread seated beside her. Popong were lolling beside me, and me and Dawn were talking about something totally forgetable matter (i cant recall it now). btw, she was sleepy too. its a very hot afternoon, and we've had a huge lunch a few minutes before. Jane and Fread were babbling about something like "....Melbourne to Sydney, kita naik flight la... dari Sydney... jetstar..... Virgin..." "....erry"

Me (the superstar of popping interrupting questions): Jen, mana kita mau naik ferry?

J: huh? kau cakap tidak jadi pigi Bako

D: kita pigi Bako?

F: ihhhh.. tiak maulah. panat pigi Bako

me: huh? tidaaaak... yang di Australia. mana kita mau naik ferry?

J: Australia? Ferry?

(here, we were almost talking simultaneously)

F: mana ada naik ferry? kita pakai flight la.

P: (with eyes shutted) huh? kenapa mau naik ferry?

me: (now, very confused) bukan ko sama Fread cakap tadi naik ferry ka?

J: kita ada cakap pasal naik ferry?

F: (grinning) kita cakap pasal Blackberry bah tadi. Astaga! Togou!

me: huh? Blackberry? ko dengar dorang cakap apa tadi? (looking hopelessly at Popong and Dawn)

P: saya dengar McFlurry

D: saya dengar Blackberry, tapi McFlurry pun ada juga

will i eventually go insane playing along with these idiots?

(i miss you guys so much. i keep on rewinding my mind on the above situation (the version i keep replaying in mind). each of you have the rights to deny/retell your own version) haha.. happy weekend kaibigan. God is awesome good!

some weekends are better than others

last weekend was certainly one of my best this year. Popong from Sibu, Jen from KL flew in Wednesday (Hari Raya Qurban) and friday night, Fread and Dawn came from KK. Saturday, we sunburned ourselves in Serikin.

The highlight of the weekend was Noel's Birthday party on saturday's night! too many good things to mention (and i dont have a picture to share). enough to say, from now on, i'm a converted baking enthusiast! O i so love the moist carrot cake (and i never ate anything sweet with cinnamon).Dy, your carrot cake was the only exception.

and the plan for 10 days DownUnder?! guys, i AM in.

kaibigan, kasi up stamina okey? mesti berjalan dengan sangat bersemangat merayau-rayau di Wat itu..

when words failed to describe the outburst of feeling you felt when that boy ran to his grandpa and said "you bought everything for me?". and you knew part of his history. and looking at apu's, nenek's and mommy's faces (the struggles they may have been through). and realized, this is love. this is the feel of being loved.

when friends come over,

say goodbye to your diet, say hulo to late night gossips and cover your ears when swears criss-cross.

and please, try not to be too overzealous on converting them to your religion (ie: books, sewing, crochet) not everybody love the concept of a quite evening WITHOUT a TV. get real, its not zaman batu.

most of all, let them play with your friend's cats and feed them well. (the human and cats)

you can let them sit on your living room floor if you dont own and sofa. its ok to let them sleep on the floor also. and let them use their backpacks as a pillow. provide enough air abok for this purpose. it'll do the trick. (the JUNK proved to provide stiff cocktails- bring them there). you? keep on sipping shiraz.

Hinakah aku kerana tidak memiliki set TV di zaman moden ini ?

O! happy day!

reason enough for a happy day.

p/s : click here for details

a very fine day

on a fine day,  

sometimes, we get lucky to see the blue sky

with blotches of fine clouds

(most of the times, we're just too busy to look up) (sigh!)

on  a fine day,

sometimes, we get lucky and get away

to an island

with friends we love to hang with

(most of the times, we're too busy minding our own business) (darn!)

on a fine day,

we get lucky to come across

with a person

we're more than honoured to be friend with

(yay! u guys rawk!!)

p/s: all pics were taken by Jane's Nikon D80. thanks jane!